I'd Google it for you because I know your lazy
Sunday, June 5, 2011
Nobody is perfect. By any stretch of the imagination. Everyone makes mistakes. And when you make a mistake what is the first thing that you say? Nine times out of ten is probably a curse word. I do it still and so does almost everyone else. You may be wondering why in the heck is he talking about cursing. Then your mind goes to "oh I know why its because he is a F-ing fag!!" Well thats not true and Judas Priest is that hateful. You don't even know me you coc...See I almost started to swear right there! Let me explain. Since I was a little boy knocking out the nastiest, most vulgar, and down right offensive curse words has been my way of life. I have always had the composure to not curse in front of teachers, family, holy ghosts, and what have you. But as I have grown through my years I started to listen more than talk. Plus its a lot cooler to be the quite person as opposed to the raging douche that wont shut up. Well as I was crafting my skill at being cool and calm. I noticed everyone cursing and saying basically the same stuff I have been saying for a long time. Then it donned on me. We sound like uneducated marsupial butt-holes when we use swear words in our casual conversations. Granted this is only my opinion but I didn't like it one bit. I thought I am better than this and I will not sound like Corky from the TV show "Life Goes On." (If you don't know what I was referring to Google it you will be pleasantly surprised) Plus I have kids now and I have to try and set a good example. Now don't get me wrong. I still rattle them off like a British porn star, but I have learned to pick and choose where my foul language shows up. And I was pleasantly surprised on how my vocabulary started to improve.
I am a Air Traffic Control Specialist according to my job description. I love my job I really do. I have had many a job before this. From being a sandwich artist at Subway to building aircraft at a huge industrial plant. But every job has its down falls. The things that drive me crazy about my job are as thus. Doing ATC is not my main job. Being in the military your main job is "do what I tell you" to do. From filling sand bags to digging ditches that is the main job of the military. Granted you will not always be doing that kinda stuff. But eventually the time will come for you to do the stuff people turn down jobs because of. But anyways. Some of the things that drive me crazy is training new people. Maybe its because I am quite possibly the greatest ever at my job (or so I think). But what drives me crazy about it is their complete lack of knowledge of the local area. They don't know our sectors, our departure procedures, our air field layout and our instrument approaches. If that last sentence sounded like Greek then just wait. When I try and explain the ILS procedures to some guys they look at me like I have down syndrome. I try and explain VOR procedures I get the same treatment. But its ok, I can handle it. Approach plates are kinda difficult to understand But most of all what drives me crazy is people approving things with out even knowing what they are approving. Example, a helicopter asks for a roll on landing to the primary runway and the trainee controller approves it without even knowing what they just approved. That is the kinda stuff that can get you into some serious trouble. But hey what so I know right?!?! Im the jerk that has to yell at someone for it. And I am the one that gets into trouble if something bad happens. But all in all I can deal with damn near anything that gets thrown at me. And that is one heck of a feeling of accomplishment. But the next time you are flying just think that its not completely the pilot who has complete control of what the plane does. The aircraft climbs and descends, turns and avoids because of what we say....
Don't you feel safer?
Saturday, June 4, 2011
I was thinking about my interests for a while after I finished writing my hobbies post. I am totally a nerd. I am proud of it. I enjoy reading reviews about cell phones. Even though I don't even own one. I like reading about the newest processors; granted I don't know anything about them. I am a collector. I still prefer to buy actual CD's over downloading music. I recently discovered that like to read. I know I know reading right! I use to be the guy who said "Why you trying to read that word on that sign? Are you gay or something?" But look at me now. I am a regular Read McReaderton. The last book that really tickled my fancy is John Dies at the End by David Wong. Awesome book. Everyone should check it out. And supposedly they are making a movie about it. Wicked cool for me! Oh I really have a thing for the Predator movies. I don't know why; I think its a cool concept. I am really about to drop a bomb here. I like Star Trek better than Star Wars. Lame right?!? It more organized to me if that makes any sense. I love me some campy horror movies. "Teeth" was a cool one. Also there is this Japanese movie I believe called "Dumplings" freaking awesome as well. I have been kinda out of the loop for a while now. I just watched the "Walking Dead" for the first time the other day. I almost cried it was so bad arsed. I love me some zombies. I always have a plan of action for when the Zombie Apocalypse begins. I am talking every situation. If I am in a store I make a plan of action for escape. I am a total nerd at heart and its freaking sweet!
I know I am
I hear people talk about their hobbies with extrema enthusiasm. People talk of how they much they love their hobby. Things like fast cars, hopscotch, cosplay, and drinking till they black out. I am jealous of all these people and things they love. See I am a very boring, flaky, and disinterested person. Don't get me wrong I enjoy many things, but none of which I can truly consider a hobby. I have tried to gain many a hobby. If I was to try and explain the stuff I think is neato or radical it would be the "nerdier" side of things. So I try and stick to things of the such. I tried to play WoW, because I have heard of so SO many people whom obsess over this game. And me being the open minded individual that I am decided that over ten million people might be on to something. Well I gave it a try. Ehh it was OK. I couldn't really get into it and I also got banned for something rather quickly. I will not get to into the details but apparently buying things from a shady *Chinaman in the game is wrong. (*he was from China and thus it is not a racist term) Anyways that didn't work out. What else have I tried to get into. Comic books. I know what your thinking "This guy tried to play WoW and get into comic books!?!?! What a douche!!!" Well I really can't argue. But I got more into the collection side of it and was trying to just acquire valuable ones. But I fizzled and got board on that endeavor as well. I just don't have what it takes to really be gung-ho about something. But don't fret for me, for I have realized long ago that I don't have the attention span or the desire to learn all the ins and outs of any interest. Maybe my true hobby is apathy?
I am so jealous
Friday, June 3, 2011
My family has gotten big. I just realized it. Kinda sad when you only realize it when your a year into your daughters life and three into your sons. But anyways this realization of events that came much too late in my mind also opened up a can of worms. I need a new vehicle. And I hate to say it but a minivan might be the only way to go. See how I whispered the word minivan? I don't even want to say it out loud. Why is it that when you are younger you say to yourself "I will never get a stupid minivan, I will be a billionaire cowboy with a PHD in being an astronaut!" Well none of those career paths worked out for me. So the only real choices I have are as follows: minivan or a huge SUV that I can only afford to keep at 1/8th of a tank. And that would still cost me $138! So it looks like I might have to finally grow up a little bit and take one for the only team that matters anymore. And do the prudent thing.......and........and........get a minivan.
maybe not all vans are lame.....
Thursday, June 2, 2011
I have a job where I talk to pilots. I guess you could say I "control" them while they are in the air. What is strange is you can pretty much stereotype pilots by nationality. This isn't really a bad thing. For example American pilots will do damn near anything you say. You tell them to turn into a giant mountain they will do it. They don't sound to excited about it but they comply. German pilots on the other hand will....well.....for lack of a better term are vagina's. They are scaredy cats. They think they know better and will not do something that they feel puts them in "unnecessary danger" such as fly over a city. But I can relate I really can. Your in the air and you want to feel safe and cozy. But that brings me to Russian pilots. Man alive do these guys have balls the size of grapefruits. Their English comprehension is low. Their ability to speak it is even lower. Now let me say that English is the only language usable by the FAA and ICAO. If those acronyms mean nothing to you don't fret its not really that important to the rest of this story. These guys will be in the air in the crustiest of aircraft's. Such as Mi-8, AN-12, AN-24, and IL-76 just to name a few. The visibility will be practically zero. These guys will call up and tell me they are twenty miles when they are actually fifty miles out and say this "Gear down ready to land" all while sounding like Ivan Drago from Rocky IV. It is an amazing thing. I think a few of the guys have been faced drunk while I have talked to them. You can barley see the runway they land park in front of you. Maybe its just me who finds this funny because I have to deal with them. But they get out of their aircraft and look like this so you be the judge.
His name is Nikola and he likes to party